Opinions and Thoughts of LightHouse Dann Verner - Just as he is!

Final Preparations For Jordan’s Celebration of Life February the first is just about here. A day I dread.   The day my wife, Jennifer, my oldest son, Randy, my youngest son, Dakota must say our farewell   to our son and their brother. For those who have asked, here are the details and location of the Service and Reception. Saturday, February 1, 2020 at 4 PM – 7 PM at the Canadian Legion Hall Number 73, 2 Robinson Avenue, Toronto,  (Danforth Avenue and Danforth Road) Anxiety is high for the family. I am worried for my wife. She has been staying strong as she can. Yet, I know how she feels inside. I know she is hiding ninety-nine percent of her pain. She is brave that way. Forget not that she is also watching me slowly deteriorate. Everyday wondering if this is the day Dann passes from his cancer? A father’s love is like no other, also, A strong genetic companionship of the Alpha and his Beta’s. ` Daddy Know`s Best ` so follow your Father and learn to be a good ma...

Stress is killing me. Literally. Those who know me understand why I say this. Medically, since November 11th, 2016,  I have battled through nine kidney surgical procedures. Including one that became infected and resulted with damaging my heart. My first Laparoscopic Surgery My heart has been iffy since an electrical accident in 1989, whereas I suffered electrocution resulting in a major heart attack. For eighteen months I suffered with pericarditis. Then came 1999. The most tragic year of my life. During the month of February I noticed that with every step I took I felt a “shock” up my spine. On March the fourth it became so severe I attended the emergency department at my local hospital. March the fifth I was in surgery having my C2, C3, c5 and C6 dissected.  They used bone from my hip and Titanium Semple plates to re-build my neck. I was five foot nine before the surgery and five foot seven after. I passed away during the operation. After a forty ...

The weight that spans my shoulders weighs heavy upon my heart. In a series of almost comedic events my life went from that of hope, peacefulness and routines,  to one of chaos,  hopelessness and fear. I could have avoided all of this if only my building management had informed me immediately of the non-payment of my rent. By their delaying me notice until late September,  I had then accumulated August,September and October's payment all at once. An impossibility considering my income.  And now I am mere days away from losing all my material possessions and the psychological trauma of being homeless with a thirteen year old son.   I have tried all the various resources to no avail.  I am a victim of that social services hole between disability and pension.  Too young to be old and too old to be young. Soon I must face the surgeon's scalpel.  Not once, but at the least twice.  A kidney removal and gall bladder.  I am not ...

The weight that spans my shoulders weighs heavy upon my heart. In a series of almost comedic events my life went from that of hope, peacefulness and routines,  to one of chaos,  hopelessness and fear. I could have avoided all of this if only my building management had informed me immediately of the non-payment of my rent. By their delaying me notice until late September,  I had then accumulated August,September and October's payment all at once. An impossibility considering my income.  And now I am mere days away from losing all my material possessions and the psychological trauma of being homeless with a thirteen year old son.   I have tried all the various resources to no avail.  I am a victim of that social services hole between disability and pension.  Too young to be old and too old to be young. Soon I must face the surgeon's scalpel.  Not once, but at the least twice.  A kidney removal and gall bladder.  I am not ...

I AM TIRED. ....VERY TIRED ​As I sit here fighting this demon at three o'clock in the morning,  I am totally ashamed and disgusted with myself for what I have done to my life and the affect it has upon my child. I cannot recall one minute of my past existence that can compare to the disaster which I now am living. I am lost. I am broken.  I am repairable and I know which path I should be walking on, but I cannot repair myself.  Deep down inside I am struggling with a very dark entity and I am riddled with guilt,  shame, weakness and dangerous emotions. I know I am mentally  stronger than most people.  I know that all things must pass I know I will never take the cowards way out of this sorrow.  I know that I am truly loved by many, many beautiful souls, for it is their love and friendship that fuels my fighter and  logical self. BUT ...... I must confess that I am weak -  I am so very tired.   I fear I have not the ps...

I have never been so embarrassed in my life but I am in a very bad crisis in my life and am in desperate need of assistance and/or  a miracle. Here is a link to the gofundme page that will explain. http://www.gofundme.com/need-help-stabilizing-my-life-2uywn3rc